The challenges of navigating adulthood as a Millennial
Today I was planning to write about my experiences with my mother and the struggles we have faced in our relationship. However, in order to clear my mind, I decided to shift the focus of today’s blog on my thoughts and emotions and day to day struggles, I want to let my mind laid bare, vulnerable without a clear line.
Before I begin, I invite you to read the beginning of this self-growth story. Don’t miss out on the process and steps I am taking towards my self-growth.
Seeking Clarity
Sitting on the couch at home, gazing outside, I feel a mix of relaxation and restlessness, accompanied by a sense of discomfort. The sky is a pale blue, painting the silence of an early spring Sunday. Being inside my head, I yearn to talk and connect with myself to release my thoughts and tension.
The Complexity of Life as a Millennial
“What is life?” Is a question that comes to my mind, while I am sitting on the couch. It can be both complicated and deceptively simple. I am constantly overwhelmed with thoughts about the future, expectations, goals, and societal pressures.
Currently, my life revolves around work and personal growth, while trying to hold on tight to the time and memories I spend with loved ones.
I am grateful for the opportunities I have been given during my life, because these brought me to where I am today. Yet I question the purpose of it all and where I am headed in the future.
Struggles and Coping
I often lack motivation to go to work, but I understand the importance of securing financial stability for the future. At times this makes me feel trapped.
Silencing my mind by meditating takes me effort, but I know that meditation can help improve my thought patterns. Discussing my emotions and traumas with my therapist is challenging, but I recognize it is necessary for my personal growth.
Similarly, while I may not always have the energy to wake up early and go to the gym, I understand that it is beneficial for both my physical and mental well-being.
Reflection and Pursuit of Happiness
As I am reflecting, I realize I can be struggling to find motivation for these things, but I know these activities will bring me a reward in the future.
In contrast, I am often consumed by these goals for the future, rather than being present in the moment. I suppose this is a common aspect of adulthood; every day can seem like a blur, causing us to lose sight of our true selves.
The Quest for Happiness
From a young age, I was taught that education is the key to achieving my dreams. And indeed, it has brought me to where I am today. However, I still feel like I have everything and nothing at the same time.
My life seems to be an ongoing journey of growth and pursuit of a dream for a better future. My desires in life are simple – to be happy, spend time with my family, and engage in activities I enjoy such as writing, reading, and sports. So, what is stopping me?
Struggles with Happiness
Perhaps it is the pressure to meet certain goals and expectations, or the idea of what I should want, based on societal norms: having a stable job, achieving financial stability, owning a house and maintaining a happy family. Or perhaps I am pursuing these goals, because I have never had them during my childhood.
Some of these worries may reside in my mind, and I am often told that I can choose to be happy, it is not as easy as it sounds. How can I choose happiness when I have never been taught how?
In fact, experiencing happiness often makes me anxious, as if something bad is about to happen. It seems like happiness is a state of mind, and as I contemplate the meaning of life, I am unsure of its true purpose.
Embracing Inner Peace
I believe that our bodies play a significant role in shaping our experiences because they are where we express our feelings, sensations, and emotions. It is as if our bodies have their own unique agenda, separate from what drives our souls. I think we are all just trying to figure out how to take care of our bodies and fulfill the desires of our souls as we embrace the complexities of human existence.
In consequence, I think that the key to finding inner peace is the synchronization of my body and my soul, working together instead of in opposite ways. I wish for myself that inner peace and happiness, as they are closely connected.
I do not want to spend my life pursuing someone else’s idea of happiness, but rather my own. For now, I continue with my 9-5 job, working on training my brain to accept happiness, peace, and forgiveness.
I am looking back at he sky, the light blue hue transitions into a deeper shade, and in this moment, I am embraced by a tranquil understanding. I reflect on the fact that I am not alone in feeling apprehensive about work, life, and the future. Each person contends with their own unique struggles. These are merely my personal experiences.
In my next post, I will share more about my therapy journey, personal growth and how I am healing and moving forward, determined to not give up. I invite you to continue this journey with me in my next blog story.
